Tag Archives: Getzlaf to Montreal

Patrick Stewart brings you: All-Star Rumerz!

Make it so Count, Make it so

Intro’s bore me. Let’s get to the goods:

Habs looking at NJ ‘s Parise, would have to give up 1st rounder plus. Also interested in Clarkson

SIZZLE SAYS: Giving up this year’s first rounder would certainly move Gauthier into contention with Reggie Houle for Best GM of all time.

Habs interested in Kings Jarret Stoll, Kyle Clifford, Andrei Loktionov, D. Brown, D. Penner, Matt Green Kings looking for A Kots, Moen, Weber

SIZZLE SAYS: Habs also interested in acquiring the city of Hollywood, Kobe Bryant, and the Terminator’s bastard child.

Habs interested in Buffallo’s D. Roy-who may already be looking for a house in MTL

SIZZLE SAYS: Hey Derek, got a lead on a new place for you. It’s near the airport, big, looks like a plane, and it brings your ass right back to Buffallo.

Habs interested in Blues’ C.Stewart

SIZZLE SAYS: Patrick Stewart is the best Captain ever to grace the set of Star Trek.

Gomez to Phoenix?

SIZZLE SAYS: I plead the fif

Kots will be signed for 3 yrs/10M, or dealt by deadline

SIZZLE SAYS: We may score a goal tonight, or we may not.

Habs interested in Getzlaf. Package would include Subban. Also interested in Ryan.

SIZZLE SAYS: Can all you PK haters just shut the f&$% up already? Our D is terrible, and you want to trade our best defenceman?!

Habs interested in Staal, Canes asking Pleks and Subban. Another report says Pleks + AK46 for Staal, 3rd rounder.

SIZZLE SAYS: Why is Carolina still in the NHL?

Habs interested in Stastny. Pleks + Weber the other way.


PuckBandits – One stop Habs Rumerz shop: The jokes are made up but the Rumerz are real.


Post Lars-Effect Rumerz

Happy Friday!

The one and only inside source

As usual, the Twitter universe is blowing up with Habs trade Rumerz. I keep picturing a little odd looking snitch that just chills with Canadiens management, and whenever it (because it’s asexual) gets caught, it does this little jig, amusing the hell out of Goat and company, and thus reminding them why they keep the snitch around. I mean, that’s a lot more entertaining than saying these are all made up, right?

Here goes the Rumerz:

Jared Boll of Jackets on table for Weber, PG not budging

SIZZLE SAYS: Nice PG! Weber is really useful right now, hang onto him at all cost!

Habs are in the running for Getzlaf, Rumerz swirling around Pleks and Subban, yet others say Getzlaf and Ryan already traded to Florida and Toronto

SIZZLE SAYS: What would your reaction be if the Laffs landed Getzlaf? Perhaps volounteer for a radical pharmaceutical experiment that could land you in a perma-coma?

Habs after Vermette and Brassard, also interested in party animal Carter, no mention of Umberger this week

SIZZLE SAYS: But I want Umbergerrrrr (stomping feet and whining for a cookie)

Habs looking to acquire Anton Babchuk from Flames

SIZZLE SAYS: Yes! There’s the Goat I know! Another D-man!

Gomez will be put on waivers once he is cleared by doctors

SIZZLE SAYS: Lots of amnesia going around it seems. The Habs brains already stated this wouldn’t happen.

Habs interested in Wheeler and Fehr, Jets want Cammy

SIZZLE SAYS: I was at the Ellercopter special this week. That’s all. I just wanted to rub it in for those who weren’t.

Habs willing to sacrifice PK because Beaulieu in the wings

SIZZLE SAYS: Yeah totally. We have Gallagher in the wings too, so might as well trade Pacioretty.

Habs still in talks with Lightning

SIZZLE SAYS: I also enjoy talking with people.

Help! The snitch is after me!

PuckBandits – One stop Habs Rumerz shop: The jokes are made up but the Rumerz are real.