How I feel after all the Habs signings today:


Chicken McTherrien?


Good Luck Marky Marc!


Take Two: School’s Out

Asleep at the wheel.

Now where were we…

Mercifully, the season has ended.  Forgive me for nodding off during the last month.

There’s no point in rehashing the season that wasn’t: Mitch Melnick’s blog nails it right on the head.

Let’s focus on the future.  Tuesday night’s almost farcical NHL lottery gave the Habs their closest shot at a franchise forward since Lafleur.

Habs never should've let this happen.

The Oilers will definitely pick Nail Yakupov.  But then it gets interesting.

Scenario 1:

Look at the Oilers’ Top Six:

– Hall

– Eberle

– Nugent-Hopkins

– Hemsky

– Gagner

– Paajarvi

Edmonton could draft a defenceman or #2 centre (Pretty thin after Nugent-Hopkins) and use Yakupov to gain another asset.

Given the Oilers’ plethora of high scoring forwards, the new Habs GM should package their first and Tinordi for Yakupov. That’s probably not enough, but it would get Tambellini’s attention.

– If you’re an Oilers fan, just imagine Ryan Murray and Tinordi as your top 2.  Or Grigorenko as a # 2 or # 3 centre.

– If you’re a Habs fan, you get the skill and flamboyance not seen since Kovalev flew his plane away.

Yakupov fits right in with Montreal’s theatrical personality.

The Electric Company

Scenario 2: 

In all liklihood however, the Oilers will greedily retain Yakupov’s services and sacrifice one of their current Top Six.  My guess is Sam Gagner.

Again, the Habs need to be aggressive.  If they are serious about finding a possible replacement winger for Plekanecs/Eller, Magnus Paajarvi would be worth the risk.

A Forsberg, Grigorenko, or Galchenyuk Habs pick would mean the end of Tomas Plekanec.

With Desharnais installed as top C and Eller a Pleks-in-the-waiting, Montreal could procure the services of a rugged scoring winger.  Jarome Iginla would fit quite nicely.

Until then, here’s a reminder of why we follow their every move:


On the Road to Ruin


Top Ten Reasons Habs are Rooting For QC City

10-It would more than likely eliminate Pat “Mad Dog” Roy from ever being head coach

9-There would be a worse team than the Habs in Quebec

8-Half the team is actually hoping Montreal relocates to QC city

7-Poor Randy Cunneyworth thinks it may impact his future with the team

6-Rejean Tremblay may actually tone it down a bit, or better yet, SHUT THE F%^# UP altogether

5-They’ve been working on Nordiques one liners all season

4-The Nordiques are just hilarious

3-The Habs are taking bets on how long it takes before Michel “gang sign” Bergeron is hired as Nordiques Overlord

2-Eric Lindros has agreed to a contract with the Habs contingent on the return of the Nordiques

1-Beating the crap out of the Nords is like taking the puck away from anyone on the Habs 2011-2012 roster: easy as banana cognac pie biach!


Top Ten: Speech and Thinking Patterns

10 – 

9 –  

8 – 

7 – 

6 – 

5 – 

4 – 

3 – 

2 – 

1- 


The Green Mile

At least they have ONE fact straight.


Take Two: Habs must draft Grigorenko

Prospect Roulette

The Fail for Nail, Blow for Grigorenko, and the Suck for Galchenyuk.

Even before the Habs playoffs hopes were flushed down the toilet, fans were clamoring for a Habs meltdown for a shot at a top 5 pick.  The last time they picked so high, they plucked their current franchise goaltender from unsuspecting loser teams.

(Is there a player besides Crosby from the 2005 draft as valuable as Price?)

Will it be Galchenyuk? Forsberg? Grigorenko? Or maybe the top dog, Nail Yakupov?

Habs fans would love to draft one of the aforementioned players, especially an imposing centreman like the 6′ 3″, 200 lbs. Mikhail Grigorenko.

Malkin in the Making?

Everybody and their pet monkey is an armchair GM: fan boards are espousing their “educated” guesses on who they feel the Habs should draft:

–        We need more size at centre a la Beliveau;

–        We need to draft the best available player a la Gainey/Timmins;

–        We should build from the goalie out and draft a big hulking D man like the Predators model.

So-called experts such as Bob MacKenzie, Craig Button, McKeen’s Hockey, and Central Scouting scramble to one-up each other on the latest player rankings.   Every waking moment of these teenager’s lives is analyzed.  Professional scouts show up in the dozens to minor league hockey games amid the throngs of aggressive parents and crazed groupies hoping to glimpse at the next big thing in the NHL (“hey, I knew Crosby from his Rimouski days”, blah, blah).

Save for a couple of blue chippers, it’s impossible to predict how an adolescent will mature as a hockey player.  But it’s clear the Habs need to hit a home run with this year’s pick come hell or high water.  Now is not the time to play it safe, so if they need to trade up to get an elite prospect, then do it.

Although talent can be broken down into measurable components (shot, pass, defense, etc.), the one intangible is the player’s mental toughness.  For every world-class talent like Crosby drafted in the first round, there are two dozen Benoit Pouliots.

This is a prerequisite for playing in Montreal.  If we’re top 10 in drafting, I target Galchenyuk, who recently returned from a serious knee injury, so he’s a wild card worth the risk.  If we do reach inside the top 5 however, I would ignore common sense about drafting a Russian and grab Grigorenko at all costs.

Sometimes you draft Doug Wickenheiser, when you should’ve drafted Denis Savard.  But Grigorenko’s talent is exceptional and at 18 years of age, will mature into a great hockey player.


Sometimes Hockey Players can be Pranksters